Crop.

This is a picture of me and my brother.

 This is how the picture looks on my brother's MySpace, with me cropped out of it...

Such is life.

Confessions of a church-goer.

The 10 things I can't confess at church. Well, I probably could, but I won't. Inspired by this post at Stuff Christians Like. There were at least two Ambers in the reply last time I checked, but I'm not either of them.

These are in no particular order: 

10. There's a few things that people say at churches that I just don't understand (or I might understand, but I'm not sure). "Filled with the anointing" (or the "anointed preaching/teaching/singing/insert church verb here").  "Prophetic word." Anything that involves "moving to a new level." I'm sure I'll think of some more the second I publish this.

9. I've never read the book of Revelation. I have no idea what I believe about Jesus' return to earth.

8. Sometimes it only takes me a few hours to forget the topic of the Sunday sermon. Usually by 5 p.m., I have to do a lot of work to recall the message.

7. If you counted the number of scriptures I've memorized (scripture reference AND text), it's not nearly as much as it should be.

6. I roll my eyes at sermons geared toward families. I know those messages are important, but marriage is nowhere on my horizon, and sermons about family topics just remind me that I don't feel like a wholly complete member of society.

5. I hate the announcements section at the end of service. I'm at the end of my "being good and quiet" rope, and I'm ready to be free. Shut up. Let's go. 

4. One time the pastor caught me talking loudly to myself. He was all, "Who are you talking to?" and I said that I was talking to God, but, in actuality, I think I was talking to myself and, at the moment I was interrupted, I had *no idea* what I was saying. I still have no idea what I was saying, but it was probably very exciting.

3. I don't think I'll ever get to a place where the phrase "Jesus, lover of my soul" doesn't sound dirty or weird. 

2. Every time someone (usually the pastor) reads to the congregation one of those e-mails that list cute and precocious things children have supposedly said, I always want to yell out, "You know, I don't think kids really said any of that stuff! I think some adult was bored one day and made up a bunch of junk with fake kids' ages and names!" I never do it, but I'm always tempted.

1. There are a good number of people I see every Sunday at church whose names I should know, but I don't because I forgot after the first time they introduced themselves. I can't ask them at this point in the game, because I've been attending church there for two years and they all know my name.

I forgot to post this here last week...

I have nothing to say except...Oh, crap.

And I even wore a bright yellow sweater today...

I was driving home tonight from church, and I went over a set of train tracks. I slowed down as I was rolling over them, and the only thing I thought was, "It would be kind of nice if a train was coming and just slammed into my car and killed me."

I don't really know what to do with that thought. 

(It's been a long year.)

Sunday Digest

I didn't get to go to Church on the Boulder* today. I was visiting my parents in Lafayette this weekend, so I visited my mom's church in Lafayette--The Non-Closed Door*  It's technically a Southern Baptist church, although the word "Baptist" isn't anywhere in the church name, nor have I ever heard the Baptist Faith and Message referenced at any time, so I have my doubts about its Southern Baptist identity. 

This was Sunday's lineup of songs, in form of YouTube videos. Enjoy!

"Praise Adonai"--Haven't heard this one in probably 7 years. It's something we tried at my old Baptist church in Scott, and it never really caught on with the congregation. 

"Arise" by Don Moen. This song is great for this church, because they have a mini-choir (about 10 people) along with three or four people holding microphones, so the chorus sounds great when the voices split into different parts.

OK, I'll admit that at this part, I don't exactly remember how it went...so I'm guessing here...

I think next was "At the Cross" by Hillsong. I've heard this once or twice. I really get excited about the chorus, when it soars into "You tore the veil/You made a way/When you said that it is done." I get the Holy Ghost tingle at that line. (I don't know what else to call it? Also, I guess this proves that I technically believe in the Holy Ghost/Holy Spirit, although I'll never admit it in public. Ha!)

Then I think it transitioned into a hallelujah chorus that I didn't really know...

Then I think we went to "The Beauty of the Lord" by Desperation Band/Jared Anderson, which I had hard maybe one other time before. Maybe at this church the last time I had visited.

Then, if I'm remembering correctly, we went into "Potter's Hand" by Hillsong. 

That was it, more or less.

*Not actual names of churches

At the risk of sounding like a lush...

I started craving a mimosa about 30 minutes ago. Like, a craving so bad that for a split second I considered going to a casino and ordering a few. I mean, I assume a casino would make that for me while I wasted away $20 on a penny slot machine.

How random. I haven't drank anything with alcohol in nearly two years. I haven't had a mimosa in at least five years. 

DumbNewsNow

I found this link to a story about a mother who fears that Obama's speech to children on Tuesday will be "indoctrination into socialism" (despite no evidence pointing to that at all.)

I thought it was satire until three-fourths of the way down, when I saw an ad for a "Take Back America" conference. Then I realized it was that One News Now is the "news" outlet that's advertised on Christian radio, which is one reason why I don't listen to Christian radio. (I put the Christian music on a CD and forego the useless political banter.)

I love Jesus; I hate his news organization. There. I said it. My blog might never survive an AFR boycott, but I'll risk it.